The Chibiest Petstore
by Casshirek
Summary: A pet store that sells chibis? /GW/ pilot chibis? Yep. Chapter Seven's up, after a loooooong time.
1. How much is that Quatre in the window?

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Author: Casshirek  
  
Summary: Chibis abound. I lied when I said that was the last chibi fic. c.c Have fun. Inspired, make no mistake about that, by the dieties of chibidom, among which is Reishin and Aphrodite. Hats off to you all. o.o I tried to be as original as possible. ^^ Part One. We meet the GW Chibi-Petstore, and we see the interactions between a Chibi-Quatre and a passerby.  
  
* * *  
  
You won't find it on any map in the world.  
  
In fact, people take extreme care to avoid listing such establishments on official documents. There is a reason for that. Past experience had demonstrated that these places attract stampedes. However, contary to the desires of the goverment, people know how to find these places. They always do.  
  
It is, invariably, a small place. No one in their right mind would make a large version of this. Cabbages, meat and cat food are safe to have in massive quantities. The things that these places sell are not.  
  
No sound ever emanates from within these pastel-coloured walls.  
  
They are sound-proofed.  
  
What is this place?  
  
It is a pet store.  
  
One that just happens to sell chibis.  
  
* * *  
  
Variations exist throughout the world, marketing replicas of different people. The one we shall visit deals primarily in the Gundam Pilots. From outside, the store is anything but striking, attired in pastel hues of cream and blue. There is a massive window that allows window shoppers to peer inside. Within several glass containers, separated to prevent unneccessary breeding amongst the shounen ai variety, are the chibis.  
  
A Chibi-Quatre awakens, blinking enormous blue eyes at the outside world. He regrets it immediately. A pink hand is raised to shield that cerulean gaze from the burning sunlight. With some care, making sure not awaken his siblings, he huddles with the group. There are about four mini-pilots in the litter, and much like sleepy kittens, they have a tendency to curl up in a cluster of golden hair and pale pink when asleep.  
  
The unfortunate Chibi-Quatre is kicked out of the group. He squeaks, wobbly- eyed for the moment it takes for the tea dispenser to register. Other pets get water bottles. The Chibi-Quatre find themselves with tea. Our intrepid chibi toddles towards the dispender, picks up the tiniest porcelain cup you could possibly imagine and pours himself some tea. He sips it and trundles towards the window, flattening his free pancake-hand against the glass.  
  
"*SQUEAK!*" A pair of enormous green eyes, set within a massive human face, take towards staring at the little Arabian chibi. He squeaks manically, a hand applied to his tiny chest, hyperventilating from shock. His terror dissipates soon enough when a candy cane is waved experimentally in front of him. Wide blue eyes follow its movement, swishing left and right in accompaniment with the red-striped confection's swaying. Abruptly, the candy cane is pulled away, and the Chibi-Quatre snaps free from its hypnotic spell. He blinks.  
  
When an enormous hand presses against the glass, the chibi-Quatre follows suit. Tiny hand is rested against the palm of the unknown human. The chibi squeaks, staring up at green eyes beyond the hand. Hand disappears, replaced only by a single finger. The Chibi-Quatre stares, his expression contemplative. Something must have triggered within the blonde head for it doesn't take long before the chibi snuggles up against the finger, trying ineffectually to wrap arms around the digit separated by glass.  
  
A hand snaps suddenly from afar, whacking the spikey brown head of the would-be buyer. Green eyes look up, narrowing and the human stands. The chibi is left staring at the swish of human legs. There's a moment of hesitation before the legs vanish and the chibi is abandoned to his own thoughts. This is assuming chibis have thoughts.  
  
"Squeak?" Pressing up against the glass, he stares into the emptiness of the pavement, tea sloshing dangerously within its cup. Feelings of desolation do not settle well with chibis. "Squeak..?" Eyes begin to tremble alarmingly.  
  
No one returns.  
  
"Squeak." A single crystalline tear rolls down his pudgy cheek as he withdraws, tea cradled to his chest. "Squeak." Chibi-Quatre reiterates, lip trembling even as he plops down onto the shredded hay and grain in which he and his littermates slept.  
  
"Squeak." He informs the silence, and sips the tea.  
  
There was always tomorrow.  
  
~FIN 


	2. Shin, the Runaway.

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Author: Casshirek  
  
Summary: The saga continues. o.o We meet a feral Duo chibi lost on the streets. What will happen to him? Quick teaser before I run off to church today. o.o And anyone want to buy the little lost Chibi-Quatre from chapter one? ^__-; All relevant characters belong to appropriate parties.  
  
* * *  
  
Tragedy is not unknown within the chibis' world.  
  
We see an example here.  
  
* * *  
  
"Squeaaaak." Violet eyes glistened within the waning's sun light, bright with unshed tears. A tiny hand pushed hard against a velvet-wrapped frame, trying to elicit attention. Nothing occured. The appendage retracted, drawn into ebon robes. The chibi shook his head, braid flying. "Squeak!" Eyes watered as denial gave way to anguished revelation.  
  
The Chibi-Duo crumpled to his knees, features devoid of expression. Tears painted silver rivulets along his cheeks and in the emptiness, the chibi wept for his loss.  
  
//... Time passes ... //  
  
A golden-brown braid flashed into view from behind a rubbish bin. With great consternation did a pair of tiny hands then reach out to grab the bothersome trail of chestnut, pulling it away from sight. Silence reigned unchallenged for a time, interrupted only by the rumbling of a truck as it passes the alley.  
  
"Squeak." Triumph laced the exhaustion in a quiet voice.  
  
Many would have found it hard to believe that our hero was a chibi-Duo. He bore little in the way of similarities with the violet-eyed darlings of the world. Thin to the point of emaciation, his dimunitive frame clad in torn black robes, the chibi was a wild child. A feral. He was one of the unowned, a creature with limited freedom and no access to the pleasures of the wilderness. He was an unwanted, a victim.  
  
A menace.  
  
Or at least, this is how some would have the public view these homeless critters. The chibi scrubbed ferociously at his cheek, suceeding only in smearing more dirt on tanned features. Amethyst eyes were bright however, alive with a light that contrasted his filthy rainments. Tiny hands roamed gingerly over a gold-wrapped object. With care, they peeled back the glimmering foil to reveal a mere slab of chocolate. Nutritional woes are, unlike tragedy, completely unknown to chibis. As we all know, they can survive on practically anything with sugar.  
  
"Squeaksqueaksqueak." The chibi, whom we shall name Shin to simplify narration, drew a napkin from nowhere, folded it twice, and tucked it into his off-white collar. The consumption of the chocolate began in earnest then.  
  
At this point in time, it must be observed that the Eighth Wonder of the World is none other than the speed with which a chibi can devour candy. What would take a human being at least half an hour to gradually eat can be wolfed down by a chibi in less than fifteen seconds. The alley was a scene of post-chocolate devastation when Shin was finished. He dabbed, a little fruitlessly, at his mouth. There was little point in his attempt at hygiene. Shin would have had to take a long bubble bath to even begin removing the layers of chocolate coating his hair.  
  
"Squeak." He declared, peering at his braid. Shin gnawed thoughtfully on the end.  
  
Pushing aside the shredded packaging, he rose with the care of a pregnant woman. Hands were rested upon his bloated belly and with unfamilar carelessness, Shin trundled erratically down the alley. He paused. Not far away was a piece of cake, a luschious piece of chocolate cake dripping fudge and chips.  
  
Violet eyes blinked repeatedly.  
  
No dirt, no fuss, no screaming stall keeper -- could it be? Shin hunched against the ground, his posture relating exaggerated concern. A clumsy panther, he stalked closer towards the cake, unaware of the silver string connected to the cake. He took a few quick steps forward, paused, repeated the earlier measure and was about ready to jump when he caught sight of boots.  
  
"SQUEAK!" Shin knew what he was facing. The dimunitive Chibi Duo turned sharply on his heel and raced in the opposite direction, puffing loudly as he attempted to compensate for the chocolate housed in his belly. He didn't make it far.  
  
Boots overwhelmed his world and in less than a heartbeat, he found himself entangled in a net. Struggles proved futile and pretty soon, all that remained of our brave Shin was a latticework of black lines, black robes, and enormous violet eyes pouring a waterfall of tears into the ground.  
  
Shin had been caught by the Department of Chibi Control.  
  
~fin 


	3. When Trowa meets Chibi-Quatre

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Author: Casshirek  
  
Summary: Quatre buys Trowa a chibi. o.o Wonder which one it is? These lovely boys belong to all appropriate parties which, unfortunately, is not me. First attempt at writing Trowa and Quatre out properly. Would love feedback as to how well or poorly I did so I can correct it. ^^  
  
* * *  
  
Quatre looped an amiable arm around Trowa's shoulders as they marched down the pavement, his sapphire eyes bright. The afternoon sky's brillance reflected on his hair, rendering the blonde strands an incandescent shade. It felt good to be out and about. To frolic in the open air, to taste nature's -- that was going too far. Bottom line was he relished the outing. Much as he enjoyed his daily routines, a change was appreciated from time to time.  
  
"We're getting you a pet, my friend and that is final."  
  
Trowa aimed a sideway glance at the other boy, silence maintained. A hint of smile gathered at his lips, illuminating perpetually wary green eyes. Quatre laughed. Of all his colleagues, he liked Trowa most. Duo was vociferous. Wufei was patronizing. Heero was, in a word, frightening. But Trowa, in spite of his quiet ways, was a most acceptable companion. It was *nice* to have someone who actually listened to him.  
  
".. did it have to be a chibi?"  
  
"What better pet than one, Trowa? They're practically human. Soon enough, you'd be ready for human interaction!"  
  
Trowa arched a slender brow. "I just -"  
  
"-prefer solitude." Quatre finished for him. "I know, I was joking but I don't want to see you losing touch with the world. You need a companion."  
  
The brown-haired pilot nodded gently. Brevity was characteristic of the young man. Trowa never spoke without neccessity. Why? Quatre had no idea. Perhaps, Trowa was conserving his words for an important occasion. Whatever it may be, it bothered him little. Everyone had their singular quirks. With an evaluating look slanted towards the Heavyarms pilot, Quatre removed his arm and concentrated on the walk.  
  
* * *  
  
[At the store]  
  
A Quatre chibi awakened with some consternation, distinctly aware of how very cold his surroundings had became. That wasn't right. He blinked slowly, azure eyes misted with sleep. Without thinking, the chibi sought out his littermates, immediately attempting to snuggle into the tangle of limbs and golden hair that was his siblings.  
  
His head made painful contact with the iron support.  
  
He blinked again.  
  
"Aww, isn't he adorable?" Voices from above summoned his attention. The chibi craned his head upwards, trying to focus on the conversation. Things might have been easier had he the height to peer over his container's rim. A flash of blonde hair caused the chibi to perk, his focus trained on his mirror. The other chibi-Quatre seemed oblivous to his scrutiny, cuddled against his new owner's garments with a look of sleepy-eyed contentment.  
  
"Indeed, he is. It's a pity that you can't take the last one."  
  
"Three is more than enough." Was the prim response.  
  
"If you say so, madame. And how will you be paying for the little ones?"  
  
"Cash." And they moved away.  
  
The desolation did not register for many moments, lost amidst disconnected thoughts of sugar and hazy former delight. But it eventually struck, a startling revelation that forced the chibi into a sitting position. Blue eyes stared haplessly at his surroundings, trying to summon vanished siblings. None came. He gathered his knees to his chest and tucked his face down, blonde hair obscuring tears. The chibi drew his knees closer, arms wrapped around his legs.  
  
Life continued.  
  
* * *  
  
"No." Trowa declared.  
  
Quatre minced up beside him and peered over his shoulders. Blue eyes widened abruptly, twinkling with unspoken laughter. He could understand Trowa's predicament. Five mini Trowas, each a perfect duplicate of the slender boy standing before them, was returning the pilot's stare. They blinked in unison, an unnerving effect in a room full of herculean eyes. Chibis had a tendency to imitate each other, resulting in a store-wide blinking marathon.  
  
"I don't blame you."  
  
"Can I have see something else?"  
  
The Arabian shrugged noncommitally. "It is up to you, Trowa."  
  
Trowa did not look behind. He swept down the rows of display cases, pausing intermittently to stare doubtfully at one chibi or another before he resumed his journey. Quatre merely watched, trying to keep his hair away from a chibi-Duo during that time. Needless to say, his efforts proved futile. Before long, the minature of our braided chatterbox had glued himself onto Quatre's hair, leaving the Arabian to hunt down the pet store owner in growing desperation. The chibi had sugar on his hands. That did not bode well for his hair.  
  
".....?" Trowa looked down.  
  
Something glimmered below his line of vision, a tiny figure pressed up against one of the many display cases arranged within the store. The solitary critter, a mess of white-gold and palest pink, appeared oblivious to his approach. Trowa reached down warily, ready to jerk aside should the chibi prove volatile. Nothing happened. Slender fingers then brushed questioningly against tussled blonde locks, smoothing against delicate flesh. A squeak coiled into the air.  
  
"Squeak?" Enormous blue eyes stared up at him. The chibi was revealed to be of the Quatre variety, a perfect imitation of the Arabian pilot that had brought him to the establishment. Scrambling to his feet, the little chibi brushed grain from his garments and squeaked again.  
  
"....."  
  
"Squeaksqueaksqueak?"  
  
"....?" To his gratification, the blonde-haired minature nodded. "I like you."  
  
Trowa scooped the chibi into his palm, a smile playing across his face when the minature Quatre sought to cuddle with his thumb. Wouldn't the pilot be surprised when he saw his selection?  
  
* * *  
  
"...." Trowa gestured fleetingly at sugar-encrusted hair.  
  
"Don't ask. Just, don't ... ask." The Arabian picked irritably at his own golden locks, delicate features contorted into a grimace. Quatre paused, aware of something he had missed earlier. A tiny albeit conspicious bulge was to be found on Trowa's uniform, supported by a nonchalant hand. "You ... "  
  
Trowa's smile said it all.  
  
"Splendid! What is - " The grin he wore faltered, reeling against the sight of a chibi Quatre. Solemn blue eyes did not appear impressed with their larger counterparts. If anything, the chibi seemed .. disdainful.  
  
"Squeak."  
  
"I like it." Trowa interjected.  
  
"But...."  
  
"You said we were buying this for me." The pilot resumed.  
  
"But...."  
  
"End of story."  
  
Quatre relented with an exasperated sigh, arms thrown out in a signal of defeat. Contary to the vexation in his tones, his eyes were bright. He extended a hopeful finger towards the mini Quatre. It retreated away from view, expression reproachful.  
  
"Well, then. I suppose it's time we figured out how to take care of one and so on. Come on, we'd have you set up with your little one in a twinkling of an eye."  
  
* * *  
  
"What do you mean it'd go into *heat*?"  
  
"I'm afraid this is of the yaoi variety, sir."  
  
"......"  
  
"You mean, you - "  
  
"I would suggest watching out for chibi Trowas during this time. Your little replicas are known to have a strong predilection for these brown- haired darlings. Perhaps, if you wish to breed them, you could always purchase - "  
  
"... um, no."  
  
"Then, you'd have to keep it locked up for now. With any luck, it might opt for some of the other breeds."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"Heeros, Duos, perhaps even Wufeis..."  
  
"Oh, God..."  
  
~FIN 


	4. Life with the Quatres?

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Author: Casshirek  
  
Summary: Other animes? Not *yet*, Foxtails. Although you'd have to share the chibi Quatre with Trowa now. Ahem. And -- I'm not entirely sure whether Quatre or Trowa will get together or not. It's a viable idea, but I might keep them straight. Depends on how people react. Anyway, no, I'm not dead -- just busy. Here's the latest installment. ^^ Short. Sweet. Nonsensical.  
  
* * *  
  
Life with the Quatres  
  
* * *  
  
Music.  
  
Every good drama must have music, right?  
  
Frantic strains of a violin caressed the air, reflecting what might have been an anxious situation. The music was exquisite, although a little coarse around the edges. The discrepancy did not seem normal. Perhaps, the musician was distressed.  
  
"What is it doing?" Quatre demanded absently, trying to focus on the busy road ahead.  
  
Trowa looked down into the silk-lined cardboard box that held his prize. The chibi Quatre, rather than cower in stark terror, had taken towards playing his violin. Where the instrument came from, and how what was apparently a young chibi could play so beautifully -- .. it was another mystery best left to the Chibis Above.  
  
"Playing."  
  
"Ah." The music changed: now, it was annoyed.  
  
And so was big Quatre.  
  
"...." Trowa dropped serenely into a new quiet and stared out into the clustered road.  
  
"Can you tell him to stop?" The music went ta-dum!  
  
"No."  
  
"Very well."  
  
And the musical accompaniment continued.  
  
* * *  
  
"Trowa?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Can I ask you a question, my friend?"  
  
"Go ahead."  
  
Quatre stared at his dimunitive clone. "What is he doing?"  
  
"Building."  
  
"..ah."  
  
An uncomfortable silence followed.  
  
"Building what?"  
  
"A house."  
  
"He's living in a house."  
  
Trowa blinked owlishly at Quatre before he made for his owner's manual. Carefully, he leafed over certain pages, unwilling to read through the text that concerned things such as how exactly male Quatres could produce little Quachicks. Finding the page, he handed it back to the disgruntled Arabian.  
  
"Something of his own.." *twitch* ".. quality?"  
  
"Apparently."  
  
"House of his own."  
  
Trowa nodded.  
  
Pause.  
  
".. can you tell him to stop trying to saw the wood from my violin first, though? I happen to like that Strauss a lot."  
  
* * *  
  
The chibi Quatre, who Trowa had taken towards calling Q-chan for obvious reasons, stared imperiously up at his larger counterpart. He wrinkled his nose, and snorted. Blonde hair was mused absently even as the little Quatre waddled aggressively over to Quatre's tea-cup.  
  
Quatre stared.  
  
Q-chan tend laced his arms around the handle and began dragging it noisily, and rather ineffectually over the glass table away from Quatre's stunned hands.  
  
"Not up to par." Trowa observed quietly.  
  
"-What-?" The chibi continued pulling the teacup away, this time in the direction of Trowa. "What do you mean not up to par?"  
  
"He doesn't think you should join the tea party."  
  
"But..." Quatre opened his mouth to protest. Nothing came out. He closed his mouth and reopened it again, repeating the process several times.  
  
His attempt to speak failed beautifully.  
  
* * *  
  
But he did get an A for effort.  
  
* * * 


	5. Love's in the air?

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Name: Casshirek  
  
Summary: We see the little Shini again. No, he isn't dead. Yet, probably. Yes, I know I'm scaring you people here. *deep breath* 13 reviews in one night, you people honestly love me. Thank you, thank you! ^___^ Now, we come back to Shini, who is resilent. And we're also going to see a Wufei here. Ahem. Warning: this fic is loaded with sugar. And I am a tired writer. Kyra? The Wufei is dedicated to you. o.- Was supposed to detail th'ways of the Chibi, but that comes in a later chapter. This one's something to tide people by while m'off on vacation in Australia. ^__^ Take care, all.  
  
Love's in the air?  
  
* * *  
  
The Chibi Pound was never a pleasant place. Grey walls stained with caramel and tears, aesthetically displeasing architecture and somber lightning made it the last place one would expect a chibi. However, there they were -- rows upon rows of them, aisles upon aisles, shelves upon shelves of glittering-eyed minatures.  
  
Those who worked within this solemn place tended to look stupid. Enormous paddings of fluff imprisoned their heads, and they were, usually very thin people. There could be no sugar within the Pound. Sugar would be a disastrous element here. True, while chibis fed on the saccharine material, they were given only coarse sugar to whet their appetites.  
  
Now, as everyone knows, those chibis who have been here for more than a fortnight are condemned towards the Writer's Mile. Where they go once they are brought into the door at the end of the route, no one knows. There was always cackling behind that door, and a shriek of a chibi. Some say, that the authors of the world had claimed them. Others say, they were sieved into alternate duties. More say, they were .. kidnapped by fangirls.  
  
The Chibi Pound was no place for any chibi.  
  
* * *  
  
What?  
  
Did you think chibis would be killed?  
  
For shame..  
  
* * *  
  
"Squeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak....!"  
  
"Oh, shut up, already!"  
  
"SqueaksqueakSQUEAAAAAAAAK!"  
  
"Arrgh, don't make me bring out the licorice whip!"  
  
Shin paused. "Squeak?" Sugar was good. He inhaled, ready to scream anew.  
  
"It's bitter -- "  
  
Shin choked back on his cries, and renewed his earlier struggles, attempting to remove a giant fist from his braid. Being abused was one thing, something that most chibis grew used to, but being pulled by one's braid, especially when one is a Chibi Duo was an enormous No-No. Yet the Chibi Pound employee did so, dragging Shin along to where a cage high above ground level was. The man snapped open the iron grid door, and threw the chibi in.  
  
Shin's fall was broken by the wall opposite the entrance.  
  
He slid down, a large bump swelling from his head.  
  
"Sque .. sque .."  
  
*BOP*  
  
Shin blinked.  
  
"Squeaksqueaksqueak." A katana, the length and size of a needle withdrew into the shadows. Something inside the darkness grumbled, and then it stepped out.  
  
"Squeak." Shin went starry-eyed.  
  
Did we forget to mention he too is of the yaoi variety?  
  
"Squeaksqueak." The Chibi Wufei who emerged, an elegant specimen who looked better suited for pampered surroundings than the run-down pound, gestured with his sword. He drew an imaginary line across the floor of the compartment, indicating his territory and the Duo's.  
  
Shin didn't notice.  
  
"Squeaksqueaksqueak."  
  
Pause. "Squeak?"  
  
No answer.  
  
"Squeaksqueak?"  
  
The Chibi Wufei looked into Duo's eyes and saw --  
  
"Sque .... " He began backing away, drawing the katana out in a protective gesture.  
  
.. that he was in heat.  
  
"SQUEAK!"  
  
The scene became obscured by a cloud of dust, flashing steel, and goggly- eyed Duos and frantic Wufeis.  
  
This wouldn't end well.  
  
* * *  
  
[Far, far away ... ]  
  
Trowa stirred in the middle of the night, to strange dreams of golden hair, blue eyes, and a rather messed-up body that could not decide whether it was female or male. He felt something on his arm, a tickling sensation that moved from his bicep down to his finger.  
  
He blinked.  
  
It was then that he became distinctively aware of an odd snuggling motion at his fingertips, and he woke up, lifted his hand to stare at his digits with a muzzy frown.  
  
The chibi Quatre was coiled up against his index finger, rubbing against it like a too-affectionate kitten.  
  
"Okay."  
  
With the other hand, he reached for the owner's manual and leafed rather calmly towards the section listed as mating habits.  
  
Meanwhile, Q-chan offered his finger tea.  
  
Trowa sighed and dialed a very irritable Quatre up.  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Q-chan needs a mate."  
  
Blink. "How do you know that?"  
  
"He thinks my finger is it."  
  
Blinkblink. Quatre fell over with a groan.  
  
* * * 


	6. The problems with Qs.

Title: The Chibiest Petstore  
  
Author: Casshirek  
  
Summary: I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! I have no idea whether this is a good thing or bad. *ahem* First things first .. Chibis aren't exactly little animals, but we're not supposed to know that just yet. *gryns* And, well, read on to figure out if Chibi Wufei is of the right variety.. *giggles* Nope. They don't go into heat in the same time, but the dynamics of writing have warped time into making it seem such. *pause* Ahem. Pretty long chapter coming up. You knew this was coming up. *also hugely, hugely grins* .... I - *pause* Read on! ^.^ *passes out chibis 'n wanders off* Disclaimers apply as usual. ^^  
  
Q-chan's Infactuation and Quatre's Solution.  
  
* * *  
  
"He won't leave me alone." Trowa announced, a little tiredly.  
  
"I see that."  
  
Quatre stared contemplatively at his minature, attempting to identify the nature of the threat. At the moment, the only danger that the chibi posed was that, if permitted to linger, he'd cut all circulation to Trowa's index and middle fingers. The possessive Q-chan, oblivious to Trowa's attempts to flick him away, had a stranglehold on those digits. The Arabian prodded Q- chan in the ribs.  
  
And got bitten.  
  
"Ouch." There was no exclamation, the magnitude of his pain drowned under growing irritation. Quatre slipped his finger into his mouth and sucked on the faint traces of blood. Along the way, Q-chan had developed sharp fangs, it seemed.  
  
"Now what?" A soft voice queried.  
  
"I haven't the slightest idea, my friend.." Quatre returned even as he began leafing energetically through the owner's manual, blanching at the images which exemplified Trowa and Quatre chibi matings.  
  
Q-chan hummed blissfully.  
  
[Moments passed]  
  
The migratory patterns of a chibi were of much concern to Trowa. For some obscure reason, the creature had ventured up the vicinity of his arm, eyes blazing with pink hearts. This resulted in the quick removal of Trowa's shirt by the pilot himself. Fortunately for him, once he dislodged the garment, the chibi was placated. For now, it rested in a tiny bundle of cloth and happy limbs, curled up like a kitten in the shirt placed far away from the main seating area.  
  
"Ah-hah!"  
  
Pause. "Ah-hah?"  
  
"Yes, ah-hah."  
  
"Ah."  
  
"You're distracted, aren't you?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Right." Quatre scowled at his minature, who remained oblivious. "It says here that the chibi Quatres won't venture into another's territory."  
  
"It won't?"  
  
"Nope. If they figure out that you belong to someone else, preferably another Quatre." The Arabian twitched a muscle under his face. It was disconcerting talking of himself in the plural fashion. "... they'd go away."  
  
"Really."  
  
"Yes."  
  
Both paused.  
  
"But - " Trowa began, raising a finger to object.  
  
"I know, I know .. we'd just have to .. fake it somehow."  
  
"With whom?"  
  
"Good question."  
  
* * *  
  
Quatres have interesting mating rituals.  
  
Much of it it involves incomprehensible formalities, difficult procedures, tea, violins and of course, far too many pink sugar cubes. But let us not linger on the last, which is a weakness common to the chibi populace. As it stands, the first few events tend to involve, well, understandably, tea.  
  
Although Q-chan had exherted its propriety over Trowa, it knew that it had to court the human first. Thus, unsurprisingly, Trowa woke up the next morning to the smell of tea. He did not immediately open his eyes, conscious of the nightmare that awaited him. For a little while, sensitive to the weight on his chest, he pretended to sleep.  
  
"Squeak?"  
  
A sigh tore free from his throat as he reluctantly opened emerald eyes to stare at the oddest sight imaginable. Chibi Q-chan was dressed, astonishingly, in a pink conflagration that made his eyes water, held a tray of tea in his hand, (where he got the matching porcelain tea set, Trowa did not know), and had a tiny table and a tiny chair, with a tiny rose arrangement in a tiny blue vase somewhere at the foot of the bed.  
  
Trowa sat up. "Q-chan?" He ventured.  
  
The chibi bowed extravagantly, wobbling like a pale rose marshmellow. Trowa sweatdropped. Then, Q-chan began a rather elaborate dance, one that involved careful pouring of tea, application of sugar, and a rather fantastic stunt involving a headstand and pouring milk into the tea. In spite of himself, Trowa applauded.  
  
He, however, held his applause later on, when sensous music floated past him in the shower and he discovered that a beaming Q-chan was playing his violin on a bar of soap inside the bathroom with him.  
  
* * *  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"We need to talk."  
  
* * *  
  
Quatre latched the door with a sigh and draped the cloth over the cage in his hands. That was the tenth chibi that they tried, all variations of Gundam Wing pilots, and none of which appealed significantly towards the little Q-chan. The best reaction garnered was a polite handshake with chibi Trowa number four before the little Quatre wandered away, snuffling with all the haughtiness a minature Arabian could summon.  
  
"No?"  
  
"Understatement." Quatre retorted peevishly.  
  
He shook his head again when Q-chan reattached itself to Trowa's wrist. The Heavyarms Pilot betrayed little emotion beyond a faint 'help me, damnit' look. Quatre stared thoughtfully at Trowa then, reflecting on the circumstances that had led right up present day situation. Q-chan never liked him. Q-chan ...  
  
"Trowa?"  
  
The other boy looked up, curiousity evinced in his face.  
  
"We need to talk."  
  
Q-chan chirped expectantly.  
  
"Without the chibi." Quatre amended.  
  
* * *  
  
".. that could work."  
  
"It should."  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"This doesn't change anything."  
  
"Of course not..."  
  
* * *  
  
[Later that night]  
  
The scene was perfect.  
  
Flames twisted within the hearth, crackling tongues of tangerine and carnelain, swirling with motes of gold and deeper strands of blood, emanating a pleasant warmth that detracted from winter's icy kiss. Music, a tranquil refrain from Mozart, eased from the distance, gentle. Inviting. A long couch is sprawled in front of the fireplace, one occupied by two forms.  
  
The first, a rather langorous looking Trowa, dressed in simple shirt and trousers, one arm draped across the back of the seat.  
  
The second, a golden-haired and blue-eyed creature, who looks possibly dreamy at the moment, drowned in some unfanthomable joy or another, yet muted by fear of being discovered.  
  
Trowa leans forward carefully, almost fearfully. Fingers brush against flaxen locks, pushing them aside so they obscured not a fair face. He smiled, eyes half-lidded with contentment. With a tremble to his movements, he ran fingers down pale rose lips.  
  
Paused.  
  
Lips met lips, and for a moment, Trowa was ready to gag.  
  
But they were sweet, the taste of them.  
  
Sweet as honey.  
  
The door cracked open just then, and a virulent sound as to be heard.  
  
Q-chan stared at the scene:  
  
"SQUEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!"  
  
Which could be translated into a rather vehement 'No'.  
  
* * *  
  
Since that day, Quatre was never even remotely welcomed by the little chibi, and frequently found melted sugar lumps in all of his pockets, chocolate in his chair and toffee between his toes. However, Q-chan no longer attempted to mate with Trowa, even if his attempts to find another mate intensified then.  
  
In the end, however, everything ended quite well.  
  
* * *  
  
"GET THESE ANTS OUT OF MY PANTS!"  
  
Pretty much. 


	7. Calling Agent Duo.

Title: The Chibiest Petstore Author: Casshirek Summary: Too tired to format it better. Just going to do it this way. Eh. Bad times, bad times. Tired. But here's the next chapter for m'faithful fans. ^^  
  
  
  
"You're an unloveable lookin' thing."  
  
Shin glared uninnocently at the chibicatcher, his glowing violet eyes wide with a certain malevolence. It wasn't a particularly potent glare; his species was, in their own way, entirely incapable of violence. For a while, the human and the chibi shared a contest of gazes before Shin broke away. He turned, messy braid flipping over his shoulder. Two weeks into his stay and the little chibi-Duo was a mess. Fortunately, it merely enhanced his appeal. Vunerable waifs have their market.  
  
"Hah!"  
  
Shin tossed an idle glare over his shoulder, bended over and broke wind.  
  
The smell was, considering the origins, astonishingly pungent.  
  
***  
  
The day had come.  
  
No one had come in to adopt the mischievious little Duo. There were, by and large, better specimens. This meant that the Duo would have to be tossed to the writers, that mysterious group of people who did away with all the little deserted chibis.  
  
"C'mere you little - " The chibicatcher fell back, hands pressed over his ears as Shin released a bloodcurdling wail.  
  
Shin clung tighter to the bars, his braid twisted around one as an anchor. There was very little of his face beyond enormous violet eyes, shimmering with bits of silver and powdered amethyst, that looked as though they'd seen a cast. They were trembling. And the Pound wasn't equipped for a flood.  
  
"Why you little .. c'mere!"  
  
*chomp*  
  
Tiny, silver teeth sank into his wrist as Shin threw peace into the wind and launched an offensive assault. The chibi catcher shrieked and swiveled, flailing desperately at the tiny bundle of aggression gnawing on his wrist. The door flew open, slammed hard against the opposite cell. All around, other chibis were cheering him on, drowning the air in a symphony of squeaks. Shin flashed a triumphant smile and jumped from the arm of the chibi catcher, racing under a cupboard, past a line of cages and then out of the door.  
  
He was, unfortunately, free.  
  
***  
  
"Squeak." Q-chan gave the filthy bundle a considering kick. It hadn't moved in three hours; it wouldn't move now. Ordinarily, the chibi-Quatre would not attend to such a disgusting thing but the velvet-clad object was sleeping in his bed.  
  
"Squeak!" Q-chan chirped more insistently, wriggling his pancake-hands at the foreign presence. After a moment's thought, he vanished out of the dollhouse to locate a pair of mini plastic gloves. Where he acquired such things is another chibi-mystery.  
  
The chibi-Quatre did not hesitate. Calmly, he locked his hands around what appeared to be frayed, mousey-coloured piece of rope and tugged hard on it.  
  
Everything then went into heck.  
  
***  
  
Quatre threw himself against the ground as a screaming, volatile bundle of golden hair and wide blue eyes came flying at his cranium. The blur was moving horizontally, a smudge of colour trailed by something that looked inifinitely less pretty.  
  
"Trowa!"  
  
A head peeked from the kitchen. "?"  
  
Q-chan blazed right into Trowa's unexpecting face.  
  
***  
  
"We've got a new resident, it seems."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Are you going to keep him?"  
  
Shin slashed at the air with a minature scythe, a regular magnet for alliteration. Q-chan gave a desperate whimper, trying to relieve the stranglehold that Shin had on his neck. The Duo-chibi had apparently decided to take Q-chan hostage. Quatre stared inquisitively at him, pondering the wisdom of an approach.  
  
"Perhaps." Trowa jerked his hand away, a second before Shin's blade reached it.  
  
"Mm. What does it want?"  
  
Shin hissed.  
  
"No, I suppose saying 'we come in peace' factors here."  
  
Shin inched towards the dining table and began stuffing sugar cubes down his robes. In retrospect, he then began stuffing sugar cubes down Q-chan's shirt. The Quatre-chibi was, to say the least, displeased. In seconds, the air was beginning to hum with desperate shrieks. Quatre clamped his hands over his ears, wondered briefly where the cloeset revolver was.  
  
"Call Duo."  
  
Quatre stared. "Oh, -no-.."  
  
"Call."  
  
* * *  
  
"You've got WHAT in the house?" Manical laughter reigned on the opposite end of the line, mingling with the hysterical screaming from the kitchen. Quatre studied the door, pondered kicking it in but opted not do.  
  
"A mini-you."  
  
"Don't have capital letters, I see?"  
  
"Duo."  
  
"Get it? Mini-U? Oh, wait - is it an uzi? Could be, right?" More laughter.  
  
"I'm going to tell Heero you have naked pictures of him in the shower in your bedroom."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Oh, shit."  
  
"Nice talking to you too."  
  
*click* 


	8. Teaser!

Title: The Chibiest Petstore Author: Casshirek Note: A little teaser, before the actual chapter... as always, college is swallowing me up. ^^ Chibis are collectin' dust.  
  
"So that's me." Duo murmured incredulously, hands rested on his hips. Flipping the edge of his braid up, he caught Quatre over the nose, leaving the Arabian to once again start counting under his breath. He was coming up on the three hundredth number and showed no signs of stopping.  
  
Trowa blinked impassively at Duo, and held up, with reinforced iron mittens, Shin for Duo's inspection.  
  
The rebellious chibi burped a rain of crumbs.  
  
"He ate all the cookies that were for tea." Quatre noted, face half- concealed behind a shield of hands.  
  
"Your fault. They were sugar-frosted." Trowa observed in retaliation, eliciting a scowl from his golden-haired housemate. Ever since Q-chan moved into the territory, Quatre had taken to sharing quarters with Trowa.  
  
Duo, almost nose-to-nose with his shrunken double, made an absentminded squeak - "Were they good?"  
  
It was, at that point, that Shin lashed out with a minature scythe, catching Duo on the nose.  
  
* * *  
  
"Rough lil' bugger, ain't he?"  
  
Q-chan, rescued with much effort, sat huddled in his elaborate dollhouse, reluctant to even step into the light of day. If anyone could have looked into his room, he would have found the chibi under blankets. Piles and piles of silk blankets, fluff pillows galore and the remanants of Quatre's satin hankerchiefs. (Somewhere, small countries specializing in the export of silks were making a profit on Quatre.)  
  
"Quatre? No, he's - "  
  
Duo stared calmly at Trowa.  
  
"Oh, Q-chan." A pause, as Trowa glanced away, scarlet cheeks cooling. ".. no, wait. Shin."  
  
"Hole in one, Trowa. Now, let's try the next question? What's one plus one?"  
  
"That was unneccessary."  
  
Duo shrugged, violet eyes laughing again. He sat up, and scrubbed at his nose, the white plaster on his nose itching abominably. It was only with the greatest of reluctance did he allow it to be applied. Quatre had, with all his courtly wiles, persuaded Duo into the task.  
  
He threatened to lock him up with Shin.  
  
Quatre, busy with the aforementioned chibi, could be heard in the distance; a vaguely unpleasant sound, what with all the shouting and strangled curses. Were it not for that hint of dischord, the afternoon would have been perfect. Glazed with shadows and honey, alive with the smell of tea and the presence of good company, it was one of those magical moments.  
  
It was a pity Quatre couldn't have been there.  
  
It was his tea the two were drinking.  
  
"So, what'cha gonna do with the little tyke? He is, I have to say, a handsome devil if you get rid of all the scruffiness."  
  
"Good luck." Trowa breathed into his tea.  
  
"Hah. You think I can't do it? I can, ya know - I just don't .." Duo groped aimlessly for the proper adjectives, surrendered and opted for a fervent " .. feel like it."  
  
No word came from Trowa.  
  
Quatre slammed into the fridge.  
  
"Good luck."  
  
".. in fact, I bet I could get mini-me to be SO attractive, even golden- boy's double would fall head over heels for him."  
  
Trowa canted a brow.  
  
"If you succeed, you get Heero's old highschool pictures."  
  
"DEAL!"  
  
*** 


End file.
